"Questions" or "Ramblings of a Lost Soul"

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"Questions"
or "Ramblings of a Lost Soul"

© By Steven J. Dresen 1981

From where does the essence of life come from? Where does it go? Or more to the point, where does my life go? To look upon the past, even now, to the present, it seems such a waste of vital energy, such "seemingly infinite" energy. Is life infinite after all, or is it just a waste of time and energy? Where does it end? Does it end? How must I seek the meaning of existence, and thereby give my existence meaning? Must I let go of all mortal things? Must I let go of "life" as well? Must I die to live or just live to die? As my life goes on, my vision of life clouds up, and there seems to be no sign of it clearing. Am I looking too hard? What of my family, can they help me? Can I help them? Will they ever see a need for help? If there exist an all powerful force, let it guide me through my life, and show me the way to peace and tranquility. Only the future exists. Nothing else matters. The past is gone, and the present quickly slips away. But what kind of future is worth living for, or for that matter, dying for? To exist is not enough, there must be meaning. Without meaning life is empty. How does one give meaning to life? Freedom: One must be free to find the meaning of life. Freedom gives meaning to life. But what is it? Is it such a vague and abstract idea? An idea that can be truly realized in life. To be truly free, is to be past death. For true freedom doesn't exist in this mortal world. Only the gods know of freedom, man can only dream.

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